Baby Makes a Match Page 13

  “Oops!” His big hands steadied her, grasping her by the upper arms.

  She attempted to step back. But he didn’t let her go.

  She looked up, and for a long moment, they stood frozen. Bethany found that she couldn’t quite breathe. His eyes gleamed in the darkness, and his head seemed to dip toward hers. She shifted her weight onto her toes, her heart slamming inside her chest. But then his hands dropped from her arms and she realized that she was staring at his cleft chin.

  Clearing her throat, Bethany quickly turned away, embarrassed, and hurried to the truck. Chandler followed more slowly, and a few minutes later, the truck turned onto the dirt road. By the time they hit the pavement, Bethany’s heartbeat had at last returned to normal. She hoped he hadn’t noticed that she’d practically thrown herself at him back there.

  They were almost to the highway when Chandler shifted in his seat and, without looking at her, said, “Thanks for your patience, especially after I hauled you out on your day off.”

  “I enjoyed it,” Bethany said, and she had, very much. She’d have enjoyed it more if he’d actually kissed her. Don’t think about it, she told herself. “I, ah, I’ve always liked animals.”

  He finally glanced her way. “Yeah? Me, too. Especially horses. I guess that’s what drew me to Kreger to begin with. He lived on his grandparents’ ranch and grew up around horses.”

  “The ranch you thought you’d invested in.”

  “The same.”

  “I’m sorry about how that turned out,” she told him.

  “Thanks. I’m trying to let that go, but it’s not easy. Asher—that’s my cousin, the lawyer—says I have no case because I had use of the property while I was giving Kreger money and no proof that it was anything but payment for use. The sale’s final, so it’s too late to file any sort of lien on the property anyway.” He glanced at her as he guided the truck up the ramp onto the highway, saying, “Besides, what Kreger did to me is nothing compared to what that Jay character did to you. If you can survive that, I can survive this.”

  She propped her elbow on the edge of the door and laid her head on her upturned palm. “I thought he was saving me from the nightmare at home. And you know, I guess he did, even if it was all lies.”

  “I’d beg you to file charges on him, Bethany, if it wasn’t for Matthew,” Chandler told her.

  She shook her head. “Like you, I have no proof.”

  “Even if you did,” Chandler told her, “it would be too dangerous. He’d be acknowledged as Matthew’s father, so he’d have rights there. I asked Ash about it.”

  She shuddered and said, “It’s better this way. Matthew has the father he needs.”

  Chandler smiled at her. “I hope so. I’ll do my best, God as my witness.”

  “Don’t you think I know that?” she asked him softly. “Do you believe, for one minute, that I’d trust my son to you if I didn’t know that you are the best dad I could ever give him?”

  He nodded and looked away, and she had the distinct impression that he was blinking.

  After a moment, he cleared his throat and asked, “Want to stop by the waffle place? Or did you have something else in mind?”

  Bethany smiled. “The waffle place suits me just fine.”

  He suited her just fine. Even if he never came to love her, he would always be the husband of her heart.

  He seemed to make an effort to dispel the awkwardness, so much so that they wound up chatting like old friends. All through breakfast, they talked. He told her about his older brothers. One, a banker in Dallas, had a wife, grown daughters and two grandchildren of his own, but the other had never married. They had a different mother than Chandler and Kaylie; she had died long ago, and Hubner had married a second time, only to be widowed again.

  Bethany talked about her own father’s death and how hard it had been for her mom. It had been harder still after she’d married Doyle Benjamin.

  It was good, sitting there talking with him, but that moment back there in the barn hovered constantly in the back of Bethany’s mind.

  Had he really been tempted to kiss her? Or was her brain shrinking as her waistline expanded?

  It had to be the latter.

  She tried not to let that thought cast a pall on her enjoyment of the morning, and in truth, it did not, but when Chandler left for the rodeo a couple hours after taking her back to Chatam House, Bethany silently wished that she was going with him. Apparently, the idea never even occurred to Chandler, and she wasn’t brave enough to suggest it, so if she was disappointed, well, she had no right to be.

  But she was.

  She definitely was.

  Chapter Ten

  Sighing, Bethany threw back the covers and sat up on the side of the bed. She’d called it a sleigh bed when she’d first seen it, but Magnolia had informed her that it was, “a French Empire burr chestnut with curved head-and footboards.” Bethany had made the appropriately appreciative sounds, but in her opinion, its best attribute was the comfort of its mattress. Unfortunately, that comfy mattress made little difference tonight.

  She knew that she would not be able to sleep until Chandler came home. It amazed her really. After Jay, she’d thought no man would ever be able to affect her again, but she was coming to realize that what she’d felt for Jay was a pale imitation of what she ought to have felt. In the end, all Jay had hurt was her pride. Chandler, she suspected, could break her heart without even knowing it.

  Trying not to think about him, she’d kept herself busy by arranging the nursery and, this morning, attending church with the aunties. She’d happily gone to a Sunday school class for women her own age, where she’d sat with Cleo Ann, identified herself to the group at large as Bethany Chatam and explained that Chandler was competing in a rodeo in Louisiana that weekend. She had put his name on the prayer list, and they had prayed for his safety and success.

  Cleo Ann had asked how she and Chandler had gotten together, and Bethany had answered truthfully, saying that he’d picked her up on the side of the road after her car had broken down. Thankfully, no one had asked when that first meeting had occurred. The subject of the baby shower had come up, but Bethany had discouraged the idea because Chandler’s aunts had already been so generous.

  The rest of the day had passed quietly. Bethany had eaten lunch with Garrett and dinner with the aunties, spending the hours between by puttering around in the baby’s room. She supposed that she was “nesting” because she couldn’t stay out of there. She decided that she’d just look in there now, be sure that all was as she remembered.

  Before she could stand, a cramp tightened her abdominal muscles. She let it run its course, breathing evenly until it waned. The pains had gradually returned after her visit to the emergency room, but she calmed her fear with prayer and knowledge. Remembering what the doctor had told her about Braxton-Hicks and all that she’d been able to glean about the condition via the Internet at work, she rose and pulled a big, misshapen T-shirt over the tank top that she wore with her usual loose-knit shorts.

  Padding barefoot through the dark sitting room, she went straight to the nursery and turned on the colorful lamp that stood atop the highboy dresser. She wandered around, trailing her fingers across the furnishings, smiling at the color-blocked rug that softened the hardwood floor and matched the coverlet, which worked beautifully color-wise with the drapery. The bright yellow window coverings were somewhat more formal than Bethany would have chosen, but she wasn’t about to complain, especially as they were permanent to the room.

  Sweeping up a tiny stuffed horse with a pale blue saddle and soft yarn mane and tail, she sat down in the rocking chair that Chester had brought in from another room and pretended that she was cradling her son. Singing softly, she worked her way through every lullaby and baby song that she knew. She had just taken a breath when a sudden voice made her jump.

  “What are you doing up at this hour?”

  She looked around to find Chandler standing in the doorway, his boots in h
is hand. Her heart racing, she gasped, “You frightened me.”

  “Sorry.” He set down the boots and walked across the floor in his stocking feet. “You didn’t answer my question. Why aren’t you asleep?”

  She shrugged. “Just feeling kind of weird, I guess.”

  Frowning, he went down on his haunches beside her and lifted a hand to her forehead. “Maybe you’re coming down with something.”

  “I’m fine.” She smiled as she reached up to remove his hand from her brow. The baby suddenly moved. Bethany instinctively placed Chandler’s hand on her abdomen, quipping, “I’m not the only one who can’t sleep.”

  He stared at her belly as it rippled, little hillocks appearing here and there, only to smooth out again as the baby moved. Finally, Matthew subsided into stillness, and Chandler looked up at her with awe in his cinnamon eyes.

  “Amazing,” Chandler whispered.

  Their gazes held for several long moments before he abruptly snatched his hand away and pushed up to his full height.

  Bethany hurried to smooth over the sudden awkwardness, asking chattily, “So, how did it go this weekend?”

  Chandler sent her a dark look and muttered, “Saw Kreger finally.”

  “Oh, dear.”

  “Would you believe that he actually wants to partner up again?”

  Bethany sat up very straight. “You turned him down, of course. Didn’t you?”

  “Of course. He admitted to me that he sold the ranch because of gambling debts.”

  “Oh, Chandler, I’m so sorry.”

  He shook his head. “You know, it’s probably for the best. I mean, it was wrong, but I sort of feel sorry for him.”

  “Why? He cheated you.”

  “Yeah, he did, but in the end, I came out of it better than he did. He says he’s been living in his rig. His trailer’s got one of those sleeping compartments in it. Thing’s about the size of a coffin. I wouldn’t want to try to sleep in there. Besides, if he hadn’t done what he did, I wouldn’t have met Drew. Might not have met you, either,” he added softly. “I probably wouldn’t even have been on that road then if Kreger had shown up at that rodeo.” He waved a hand. “Anyway, the Bible says to forgive, and that’s what I’m trying to do. Doesn’t mean I want him hanging around, though.”

  He looked so dark that Bethany decided to change the subject. “Speaking of Drew and you, how did that go?”

  Chandler brightened visibly. “We finished less than a tenth of a second out of first place.”

  “That’s great!”

  “It’s in the money, anyway, but there’s a lot more difference in first and second place than that fraction of a second.”

  “Financially, you mean.”

  He nodded. “And it doesn’t help that I came in third in the tie-down and well out of it otherwise.”

  She sensed his frustration. “You’ll find your stride,” she told him encouragingly. “All you have to do is be patient.”

  “It’s just that we’re running out of time,” Chandler groused. “It’s August already. We’re having a baby in little more than two months, in case you’ve forgotten.”

  Bethany hauled her belly up out of the chair, quipping, “You’re kidding me, right? You’ve seen what I’m lugging around here.”

  His mouth twitched. “You say that all the time.”

  “What?”

  “You’re kidding me.”

  She frowned in puzzlement. “No, I’m not. How could I? Just look at me.” She pressed down the fabric of her T-shirt, emphasizing the size of her belly.

  Chandler grinned. “You say, ‘You’re kidding me’ all the time. It’s like your trademark phrase. Whatever anyone says, you come back with ‘You’re kidding me’ or ‘No kidding’ or something to that effect.”

  Bethany blinked. “I guess I do. I hadn’t realized. Sorry.”

  He chuckled. “It’s not a complaint. I think it’s cute.”

  Cute? She wrinkled her nose. Cute wasn’t exactly how she wanted Chandler to think of her. Then again, for a woman shaped like a beached whale, it could be worse. She stepped closer and reached up to smooth back the lock of hair that had fallen forward over his brow.

  “I just don’t want to irritate you, not when you work so hard all the time,” she said softly.

  His sudden frown made her wonder what she’d said wrong. “I’m not the only one who works.”

  “I sit in a chair, answer the phone and smile at people all day,” she pointed out drily. “You work.” She tilted her head, studying his handsome face. “In fact, you look tired. You should go to bed and get a good night’s sleep.”

  “That makes two of us.”

  She smiled. “I will if you will.” A sharp, sudden pain made her gasp and grab her side.

  Chandler clasped her protectively, one hand going to the small of her back and the other to her abdomen. “Is it a contraction?”

  She shook her head, caught her breath and said, “Matthew just kicked me in the ribs.”

  Chandler breathed out a sigh. “So you haven’t been having the cramps?”

  She grimaced. “I have, but it’s okay. I know what they are now, so it doesn’t scare me so much anymore.”

  “So much?” he repeated, beetling his brow.

  “I’ve learned to pray when I get frightened,” she told him, patting his chest.

  “Good idea,” he said approvingly, covering her hand with his. “I find it helps me sleep sometimes, too.”

  Bethany smiled. “Yes, I’ve found that to be true. Maybe that’s what we need right now.”

  Chandler pulled back slightly. “You mean that we should pray together?”

  “Yes, please,” she answered, closing her eyes before he could beg off.

  After a long pause, Chandler began to softly speak. “We thank You, Lord, that little Matthew is so strong and active, and we trust You to keep him that way, but it understandably frightens his mom when those awful cramps come. Please spare her that pain and give us all peace and rest this night. Amen.”

  “Amen,” she whispered. She looked up to find him smiling down at her. “Thank you for that,” she said. He nodded. “Good night.”

  “Good night,” he returned.

  The kiss just seemed to happen, a natural consequence of all that had passed in the moments before she lifted her face and he lowered his head. The moment his lips met hers, she knew that this was what she wanted, needed from him, what she had been waiting for. She felt her hands slide around his neck, heard the soft sound that he made as he pulled her closer, his arms holding her tight. He was her husband, and she had never felt more like his wife than in this moment of sweet joining.

  If only, she thought. If only this was a true marriage.

  But how could she expect that of him? He didn’t really want her any more than Jay had. How could he, fool that she was? Chandler had done his best to help her, but she and the baby were nothing more than burdens to him. All of which meant that this lovely kiss was a terrible mistake. Saddened, she made herself turn her head away.

  He released her instantly, lurching back as if she’d thrown cold water on him. She quickly fled to the safety of her own bedroom. There she sat down on the side of the bed again, feeling foolish and scalded. After a time, she went to God, asking that He help her be satisfied with what He had given her—or help her make it all that she wanted it to be.

  So much for keeping emotional distance, Chandler thought disgustedly. He’d managed for a time—if thinking about her every waking minute and missing her something awful when he was away could be termed “emotional distance.” Still, he’d managed to keep from kissing her that day at Dovey’s. Only to kiss her in their suite at Chatam House.

  Mentally kicking himself all night long didn’t do a bit of good. He couldn’t take back that ill-advised kiss and he couldn’t get it out of his mind. He dropped off, finally, thinking about it—and woke again on Monday morning with it playing vividly in his memory.

  “Stupid, stupid, s
tupid,” he chanted softly, dressing quickly in old jeans and a tan T-shirt.

  He and Drew had agreed to practice three days a week, the same days that Bethany worked, Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday. That left Monday and Friday for everything else, including traveling to and from weekend competition. The bigger rodeos ran two, even three weeks, but most were four or five days long. At this time of year, though, those venues were far from the hot South. He and Drew had reasons to stick closer to home, which meant that Chandler found himself with a rare day off, a day when he could have simply relaxed.

  Chandler knew, however, that relaxation would be impossible this day. After pulling on his socks, he caught up his working boots and his sweat-stained straw hat and tiptoed out of the suite, thinking that Bethany would almost certainly still be asleep.

  Pausing at the top of the stairs to pull on his boots, he balanced on first one foot and then another before trotting down in search of breakfast. His mood lightened considerably as he drew near the kitchen and caught the aroma of Hilda’s cream biscuits. He could almost taste them. His stomach rumbling, he dropped his hat onto one of several pegs affixed to the wall before shoving through the swinging door. Hilda straightened and turned away from the big, old-fashioned stove, her rotund frame surprisingly agile. Beaming a welcome at him, she waved a large pan of golden-brown biscuits in one hand.

  “Ah, he’s up and about, is he? Well, come on and get your breakfast, then.”

  Inhaling appreciatively, he started to follow her to the small, sturdy, rectangular table situated before the brick fireplace, but then he halted. “Is that coffee I smell?”

  The aunties were devoted to their tea. That being the case, Chandler had intended to pick up a can of coffee for himself, but he’d taken most of his breakfasts away from the house for one reason or another, so had never gotten around to stopping by the store.